I make fun of my friends with large families. I say insensitive things like, “Here, take Declan. You’ll never know he’s there. You have too many kids to count anyway.” I’ve said that twice this summer alone. Just this week I said it to my friends up from Texas… They’re amazing. They have three boys that eat…
Old People Alert: Words You Can’t Say
I’m giving a vocabulary test. I don’t like vocabulary tests. I’m tired of them. Even though I don’t love tests, vocabulary is important. Not just for students, but for me. I’m getting old. Words change their meaning. Not being up on vocab is a dangerous thing. I used to be at the epicenter of student pop culture,…
How to Scare Students on Parent Teacher Night
Last night was parent teacher night. I love parent teacher night, but I don’t really love the format–basically, a million parents line up for ten seconds of my time. I feel somewhat like a cross between really, really rude, and a rock star. We put out appointment sheets, but they never work for me, because they contain…
How I Chickened out of Reality TV…
Few people know this, but after finishing a grueling four years at a quality institution of higher learning–majoring in waitressing, I mean, Russian–I applied for, and got through several cuts in the selection process for MTV’s Real World. It was the second season, which would have landed me somewhere in Los Angeles, if I recall correctly. Auditioning for a…