Sagging. Butt cracks. Guys with skinny jeans that look like they got robbed from a second grader. Hundred-dollar ripped jeans. Sneakers that are venerated not played in. Chains on pants. Bright red hair. Micro micro micro minis. Shirts missing sleeves–maybe it was a half-price sale for one.
These are the fashions I deal with daily in school.
If you can’t beat them, join them.
“Miss–your sweater’s ripped.” I look down and feign surprise. Indeed it is. Truth is, I knew that. I laid out my clothes for the next day, not realizing that the seam had ripped out my entire left arm, leaving a gaping flapping sleeve. I was cold. I had two choices. Run with it, or wake my husband at dumb o’clock in the morning rummaging for another warm thing to wear.
I went with “run with it.” I figured that if I can be butt-cracked daily by sagging teens eight feet taller than me, I can wear even more bad fashion. Much better than creating a grumpy guy.
But then, I got an idea.
“I know, isn’t it cool?” I said. Puzzled looks…
“It’s the next great fashion. It’ll be bigger than leg warmers and teal. You all ripped your pants and drew on them with Sharpie already–that’s old. This is new. The next thing. By the end of the week, I predict you’ll be ripping your sweaters, too. By Friday, they’ll be making these in China for the runway in New York.
I nodded and walked away, a group of freshmen looking at each other quizzically, one or two staring at a sleeve wondering if it should get ripped.
Only the two seniors stood in the back laughing .
[image: ultragross.blogspot.com]
Oh I know what you mean. I think my most uttered phrase during my last 3 years of teaching was
Pull up your pants!
Keep us posted on those freshmen…..
Reblogged this on Retail and Clothing 2020 and commented:
Don’t Judge! Fashion is nonconforming! It’s suppose to provoke and upset those stuck in the mud people.
Getting out my seam ripper now . . .
Can you sew? Or unsew… we can destroy fashion!!!
More like mend or un-mend, but I fashioned my share of off-the-shoulder-Flashdance-sweatshirts in the ’80s. So I’m pretty handy at ripping up otherwise perfectly good attire. Loved your post. You are so hilarious.